So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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