This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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