I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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