I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
