Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
