just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
My vagina is very pro this idea
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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