I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize