ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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