We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
