bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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