So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
