Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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