i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
