I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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