Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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