I smell stomach acid.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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