Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
