I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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