so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
