So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
