If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize
