Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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