I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
