She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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