i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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