You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize