I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
