dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
