You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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