i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Randomize