yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize