Her vagina should come with caution tape.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
