you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
