oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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