I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
