he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
