Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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