He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize