I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
