We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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