There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
my liver is dry heaving
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
