One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
