no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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