I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
do herpes really smell.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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