What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Randomize
