how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Randomize
