sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I've blown a few things in my day
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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