More tranny stories later!
I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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