my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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