I'm lost and stupid without you.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Randomize
