I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
organizing the empties. That sober.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
