i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
